06-21-2012, 03:02 AM
Jack, this is beautiful. It reminds me of Anne Sexton. I think you've somehow managed to capture the essence of a pent up, under appreciated woman. How the hell?
I have nothing to contribute by way of critique. To me this is flawless. As a wife who has experienced an apathetic husband, and know too many "Good Christian Women" who suffered in silence, especially a generation or so ago, I find it intriguing you've internalized and found empathy in this manner. I have personally (as a child) experienced this type of draw to harsh stimuli in response to an uncontrollable environment. I have also witnessed this manifested in others. The OCD manifestation is common. I'm still a little surprised this was written by a man, because the elements are genuinely feminine, and the use of eggs! There is much to be said regarding the use of eggs here, a centuries old fertility symbol. The protagonist is literally boiling (sterilizing) an ovum, and later you bring it ' round with mention of sexual function and children. The "wife" here is burning her hands (also symbolic) immersed alongside a personification of fertility. A representation of the systemic abrogation of a divine energy.
I have nothing to contribute by way of critique. To me this is flawless. As a wife who has experienced an apathetic husband, and know too many "Good Christian Women" who suffered in silence, especially a generation or so ago, I find it intriguing you've internalized and found empathy in this manner. I have personally (as a child) experienced this type of draw to harsh stimuli in response to an uncontrollable environment. I have also witnessed this manifested in others. The OCD manifestation is common. I'm still a little surprised this was written by a man, because the elements are genuinely feminine, and the use of eggs! There is much to be said regarding the use of eggs here, a centuries old fertility symbol. The protagonist is literally boiling (sterilizing) an ovum, and later you bring it ' round with mention of sexual function and children. The "wife" here is burning her hands (also symbolic) immersed alongside a personification of fertility. A representation of the systemic abrogation of a divine energy.
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?