Rockstar

[heslopian]

Weeks of chemical abuse leave his dull mind stale,
reflection reveals dark eyes sunken, skin turned pale,
the kind of face both child-like and yet so very old, Great line.
clothes are torn and dirty, flesh is wet and cold.

Shaking, clutching his smoke, his cancerous crutch,
harmless in his sadness and so gentle in his touch, Really moving line.
but nobody can see him for he is the urban ghost, Is "but" needed?
blinded by the acrid fumes to which he is engrossed. I think "by" might be more grammatically correct than "to which".

Homeless thus forever lost, his poverty sincere, Could "homeless" be put after "lost", with a comma after it?
fear drives him to seek solace, his new motive is clear,
but cracks inside his pipe becomes the cracks inside his mind,
and it cracks in the foundations of the life he left behind. Is "it" needed?

Life a nightmare endless, but he begins to form a dream,
swirling dust, cardinal paint, some strange metallic gleam, Good line, punchy and imagistic.
these hidden dirty memories of what was once his home,
remind him why he must be free and ever must he roam. Great last couplet. Compellingly tense.

Perhaps he once was clever, for his words are full of jargon, I think "his speech is" might make more sence than "his words are". Jargon is words.
talks in hopes of pennies, which with crystals he will bargain, Shouldn't "pennies" and "crystals" be the other way around? He's a drug addict, so surely he's buying crystals with pennies (assuming "crystals" refers to drugs).
then huddles in amongst the filth and wraps himself in lies,
surrounded by a cloud of smoke in which his spirit flies. Really good last line. Crisp and effective.

Most of my suggestions are just grammatical nits. You have some really strong images here which effectively portray a character. Critique is JMHO. Thanks for the read.