06-14-2012, 02:01 AM
Fay Ray,
I think an approach to this might be to personalize him, make him an individual, give him a name, that way he does not represent "all" addicts.
I think some of the harshness comes because there are those who love the addict, and he/she will promise never to do (whatever) again, then of course they do, repeatedly. Eventually people get burnt out, because they fell as though they have been betrayed over and over again, as well as feeling used, and condescended to by the addict. And this is if nothing really major occurs. Some times it takes awhile for people to get burnt out, maybe 10 or 20 years, but it eventually happens. It doesn't surprise me that younger people would accept this, because they haven't gone through...yet...all the things that people who have had to live longer with this have.
I think one of the things (and I mean if you are going to have success in this endeavor) you need to comprehend is that these people who seem uncompassionate at one time were very much that way, and maybe saw the person very much in the way you are portraying. The question is, what are you going to do to help them overcome all of those years of resentment, and built up feelings of hurt and betrayal. I don't think you do it by showing them a picture that denies their experience.
Really to me, this is the same as trying to get a former girlfriend to feel sorry for a former boyfriend who cheated on on, stole from her, lied to her, hit her and raped her, to feel compassion because he had/has severe depression that he did not know how to deal with, and how terrible it has been for him. That might work on some girl who doesn't really know him, or such things have not happened to, but it is going to be a hard sell for those who have. Plus, I'm not sure it is even a good thing. People sometimes need a little less compassion to protect them from such a predator. And that is what the addict is, because the disease is in charge. If you said an addiction demon had possessed his body, if would be a fairly accurate description. Certainly the original personality is no longer in charge, nor do whatever feelings or morals he had come into play any more. I'm fairly certain compassion would not even be beneficial for the addict, certainly not an outward display.
Just my take,
Dale
PS I posted a poem I wrote about getting burnt out on a person in case you want to look at it. It is here http://pigpenpoetry.com/showthread.php?tid=6230
It's called "A Deeper Cut" It is fairly long
If you wish to comment on things of need of editing that's fine also. It's an older piece and I have not looked at it in awhile (read 8 years)!
I think an approach to this might be to personalize him, make him an individual, give him a name, that way he does not represent "all" addicts.
I think some of the harshness comes because there are those who love the addict, and he/she will promise never to do (whatever) again, then of course they do, repeatedly. Eventually people get burnt out, because they fell as though they have been betrayed over and over again, as well as feeling used, and condescended to by the addict. And this is if nothing really major occurs. Some times it takes awhile for people to get burnt out, maybe 10 or 20 years, but it eventually happens. It doesn't surprise me that younger people would accept this, because they haven't gone through...yet...all the things that people who have had to live longer with this have.
I think one of the things (and I mean if you are going to have success in this endeavor) you need to comprehend is that these people who seem uncompassionate at one time were very much that way, and maybe saw the person very much in the way you are portraying. The question is, what are you going to do to help them overcome all of those years of resentment, and built up feelings of hurt and betrayal. I don't think you do it by showing them a picture that denies their experience.
Really to me, this is the same as trying to get a former girlfriend to feel sorry for a former boyfriend who cheated on on, stole from her, lied to her, hit her and raped her, to feel compassion because he had/has severe depression that he did not know how to deal with, and how terrible it has been for him. That might work on some girl who doesn't really know him, or such things have not happened to, but it is going to be a hard sell for those who have. Plus, I'm not sure it is even a good thing. People sometimes need a little less compassion to protect them from such a predator. And that is what the addict is, because the disease is in charge. If you said an addiction demon had possessed his body, if would be a fairly accurate description. Certainly the original personality is no longer in charge, nor do whatever feelings or morals he had come into play any more. I'm fairly certain compassion would not even be beneficial for the addict, certainly not an outward display.
Just my take,
Dale
PS I posted a poem I wrote about getting burnt out on a person in case you want to look at it. It is here http://pigpenpoetry.com/showthread.php?tid=6230
It's called "A Deeper Cut" It is fairly long
If you wish to comment on things of need of editing that's fine also. It's an older piece and I have not looked at it in awhile (read 8 years)!
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.