06-11-2012, 12:23 AM
really quick, going to have to agree that rhyme takes precedence over the content in spots. it's a shame, because it is already a quirky enough read (i liked the idea enough, though I'm not sure if I agree with the speaker 
)
I think a meter would help a bit; would keep it fairly regular, which might help to constrain your lines
for instance:
) I think a meter would help a bit; would keep it fairly regular, which might help to constrain your lines
for instance:
Quote:Thus the tower too did slump,deleting the "down" aids the flow for me
ardor drawn down into the dumps.
Written only for you to consider.