A Clockwise Direction (revised)

[Philatone]

Welcome, penguin. It is great to have you!

Some thoughts on this piece

I found the last remaining wedding photo
behind a doll in our daughter’s room. ...the "photo" and "doll" are interesting; both seem like tools of the past that make impressions on the present, especially after several reads
Russian, as it happens, the doll that is, ...more personal than anything, but I found the line just a little clunky with the different clauses. a part of me says that is fitting when talking about these types of dolls
though I read very little into that; ...interesting line; I couldn't help but wonder what exactly was not "read into"--where the doll came from (Russia) or the type of doll (i'm imagining the layered dolls). both questions seem valid for the piece
there are layers of dust upon dust in the loft
and I’m loathe to consider conversion
at this late stage in the game. ..this line did little for me

I placed it on the bookshelf where O meets P; ...the "it" may be a little vague; not sure if that concerns you (I imagine you are talking about the photograph, though the last stanza spends so much time talking about the doll)
I’d have liked it before your favourite author
but her shelf’s too close to the ground. ...reveals some of the speaker's character
My books are in alphabetical order; ...the first line explained this already somewhat
I wake at 7 to clean and tidy
each day in a clockwise direction -
starting at the front door and ending in the bath. ...entirely a suggestion: finding a way to close with "ending" would reinforce the word, which is already balanced by the opening with "starting"

I compare it to my parents’ wedding picture
that’s hanging next to the dining room door;
they had a bigger cake, more friends and relations, ...could stop at "friends" if desired
dressed black and white, a formal occasion;...again, perhaps slightly extra details if desired to be chopped after "white".
contemplative, no eye for the camera.
My mother’s fatter in the face than I remember,
and isn’t that an ashtray beside the cake? ...I understand the desire to express change (and perhaps introduce the hazy-nature of "smoke" to go with dust), but it felt like a bit extra to me. The line above it already conveys the difference

Blow these pictures up out of proportion
and maybe we’d spot the germ of a future:
leukaemia, cancer, emphysema,
buried deep within a Russian doll.
How happy we appear! My Mum said never ...nice line break
had I looked so handsome, like Richard Gere;
perhaps that’s the joke we’re laughing at. ...enjoyed this line, contrasts with the tone of the present

Behind us I trace the faintest whisper
of the tower blocks blown in ’88.
As we’re cutting the cake, your face ...conveys a sense of surgery with the line break and "cutting"
burns with embarrassment
or anticipation of the sauce to come.
I can feel the grip that you have on my arm,
as if I might be the first to depart. ...great line, especially with how it's woven into the context

When lights fade I think I can hear you breathing,
but it’s central heating or a noise in the loft.
I close the windows to keep your scent in,
I reach out to touch an amputation; ...strong
I said we shouldn’t buy a bed this wide.
You never see pictures taken at funerals ...I'm not against this line; the idea is great though I'm not entirely sure if I connect with it. What is distracting me is how the idea doesn't have as strong of a connection to what preceded it as I would have liked. Some line before it to move on to funerals or the actual death would have made the transition a little less jarring for me. Maybe it is for effect. However, the rest of the poem refrains from doing things like that, and the stanza spends so much time discussing the relationship between two people that the switch to something general is even more dramatic. To include a "you" all of a sudden also threw me off
unless somebody important has died.

great read, really enjoyed. hope some of this may be helpful