Poetry is no Alchemist

[Erthona]

"If you don't think this poem deserves weighty consideration "poetry for fun" might be a more appropriate section."

I wanted criticism, but I didn't think it was worth work-shopping.
----------------------------------------------------------------
I could put a comma there.
--------------------------------------------------------
Do you need "plain"? It feels like a needless adjective.
I think so. Cloth does not imply "plain", and I wanted the juxtaposition with lace to be clear.
------------------------------------------------------
Should "auteur" be capitalised?
I was using it as an ideal, or a title, so I thought it should be capped.
Would you not?
---------------------------------------------------------
Nib...pen bland nib...mediocre writing
------------------------------------------------------
The syntax here feels off. Shouldn't it be "turned"?
Yeah that's not quite clear, maybe change instead of turn.
You have to overlook the second to last line as though it were in parentheses, and so it reads

Nor can poetry transmogrify the Auteur
who with bland nib of it did writ
turn from the dullard into the sharpest wit.

I might should use parentheses instead of the em dashes.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
"convey a cynicism about auteurs and modern attitudes to art"

That is a fair summation.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for your comments, I may alter the last two lines to

Nor can poetry transmogrify the Auteur
who with bland nib of it did writ
(when with palsied brain he did conceive)
change from the dullard into the sharpest wit.

Does that work better for you?

Or I could even remove the second to last line. I was meaning for it to be like an aside.


Thanks again,

Dale

---

Billy wrote "your personality shone in the piece"

Is that a good or a bad thing


Dale