05-13-2012, 03:25 PM
hello fico! I hope this finds you well
The piece has many prose elements with how it is written. At times, I felt sentences could have been shortened (many have a run-on quality), though perhaps that enhances the kind of drugged impossibility described in the poem. Regardless, some ideas felt less important than others and could probably be cut to make a more concise piece.
As to the smurf itself, seems inspired by imagination or an explanation for drugs as they works into the body.
Upon concluding, I wasn't entirely certain what I was supposed to feel.
The piece has many prose elements with how it is written. At times, I felt sentences could have been shortened (many have a run-on quality), though perhaps that enhances the kind of drugged impossibility described in the poem. Regardless, some ideas felt less important than others and could probably be cut to make a more concise piece.
As to the smurf itself, seems inspired by imagination or an explanation for drugs as they works into the body.
Upon concluding, I wasn't entirely certain what I was supposed to feel.
Written only for you to consider.