Loss

[abu nuwas]

My thoughts as they came, more or less:

• Wordiness.. It is axiomatic that every word should be needed. However, sometimes, this means that many words, seemingly redundant or pointless, will really be needed to create a certain mood.
  
• A dreamscape, of the raw sort.
  
• Turning into metric, rhyming verse. It seemed to come easily to me, and I wondered whether it would not acquire more power by doing this.
  
• Punctuation: take no notice of those other guys. If you need guidance, let me know. As it happens, it reads perfectly well as is.