03-08-2012, 05:08 PM
i think it a bit creepy, well a lot creepy really.
come dear, die with me.
the poem can be felt however and the reader becomes part of request
urging her to die with him. i have no nit's it flowed well so i'm guessing the meter works.
it had that classic feel a sonnet should have,; if i have to find a nit it would be betwixt and between, it verges on cliche. that said it really is only a nit because the bugger works.
thanks for the read, sorry i couldn't be more constructive.
come dear, die with me.
the poem can be felt however and the reader becomes part of request
urging her to die with him. i have no nit's it flowed well so i'm guessing the meter works.
it had that classic feel a sonnet should have,; if i have to find a nit it would be betwixt and between, it verges on cliche. that said it really is only a nit because the bugger works.
thanks for the read, sorry i couldn't be more constructive.