Seeds of Holy Things

[Philatone]

hello aish! it's been some time
hope what I have to offer is of use

Stars do not destroy themselves ...pretty strong opening
in one burst of fiery gold flame, ..."fiery" and "burst" already conjured up the "flame" for me. understand if you keep both for cadence's sake, but I feel as though ending on "gold" would be a bit more refreshing than "flame" when talking about a star
twinkling
to be buried in the hands of God...I really pulled a strong image from this

Instead
fire fingers creep to the edges like
jars humming with electric karma lottery
for an obsessive compulsive....I don't want to deny the strength of the images. words like "fire fingers" and "electric" carry a beautiful weight to them. that being said, I wanted something a little more tangible for an image--I blame personal preference entirely

The dark face of night is a wild drink
of soft precious amber and ripe rose;...really great drink image. I debated stopping at "amber", or at least finding a separation to draw it out even more
sublime magnetism created the...at first, I though about cutting the "sublime". It does create a tie-in with that "temple" in the following line.
Temple of the first kiss of love
with secret incandescent dreaming,

majik

and the tribe
of silver meadows of the moon. ...beautiful!

understand if the trimmings aren't to your fancy. was an enjoyable read, Aish!