Fodder for Fought

[billy]

“Eat, drink, and be merry,
for tomorrow we shall die.” the quote feels a bit weak as an opener because of its clichéness jmo (i do realize it's from eccles)

(Well at least you dumb young fellas,
those who aren’t hanged for being yellow!
What would be the point of war?)

“For it is God we are fighting for!”

(if I the King should die?
After all, it is me you fools are really dying for!
this boy here will die, a dagger in the eye
if I died, what would be the point?)

“There you go lad, have another joint,
Go ahead, drink large of that good ale,

(Cheap stuff for these fools, all stale,
The good wine for me, but my cups dry,
There Chamberlain, catch the serving man’s eye,
I have a toast soon to make,
At least my gulp I’ll not fake)

My hearty brave soldiers all.”

(Although most of these will fall,
those young and dumb, just cannon fodder,
I’ll reclaim their signing gold when they’re martyred,
one of thirty, survive and be some use,
five of thirty will get the noose,
and the rest will be a dying wall of flesh.)

“Good lad, I’m sure you God will bless, you? should it be 'you're' or should there be a comma after 'sure'
perhaps some day you’ll be a knight!”

(That made his dull eyes bright,
it will happen too, when dark is light.
I worry, to depend on these boys so blind,
target practice for the enemy line,
but they’ll delay them, so my archers can fire a volley.)

“What’s that son, oh yes the enemy is full of folly,
Thinking they can stand against our great fighting force,
have you seen your knight upon his horse?
Sir Who? Oh yes he is most ferocious.”

(Never heard of him, this boy is quite precocious,
at least for a lad of eight, he’ll never see nine,
he’ll be one of the first, cut down in the line)

“Quite now lads, I your king will make a toast.
To Thee, God’s Glorious fighting host,
Thou art strong as the land, as hickories.
Most surely with such soldiers as thee…. uhm…..….ah!
God will grant Thou the victory! Amen.”

“God Save the King, To the King’s good health!”
(Forget God boys, the King looks out for himself!)


©2012 Erthona

right, i love it. that said i'd love to re arrange a couple the opening verse.

“There you go lad, have another joint,
Go ahead, drink large of that good ale,

(Cheap stuff for these fools, all stale,
The good wine for me, but my cups dry,
There Chamberlain, catch the serving man’s eye,
I have a toast soon to make,
At least my gulp I’ll not fake)
with the first quote and verse, (just an idea to beef up the opener.) of course it could create a problem elsewhere.

i wasn't sure if it was based on king john or the 'kings' men in general (soldiers). it shows the cheapness of me to a monarch and feels a little Shakespearian in it's telling; though in the modern idiom. it's one of those poems i can't truly figure out or really need to as i think through the ages, kings and commoners have the same relationship. it still needs a few more reads from me yet, but i do like the earthiness of it. apart from my comment on the opening verse i cant see as i'd change or suggest change to anything. wish i could have been more help.

thanks for read.