The Melancholy Angel

[billy]

Down inside the darkness of a twisted lonely mind,
began the end of meaning with the life she left behind,
now scattered in the moonlight, which is cast into the past,
where lurks a beast of morose stalking patient to her last. should the be a comma after stalking?
Violated garden lies beyond cooling ashes of her smile, feels a bit disjointed
each flower stripped of colour with his filthy lust's defile, would 'which' work better than 'with'?
and thus rain must fall forever, leaving marks upon her face,
or as glitter on the cobwebs like the liquid on the lace. nice L's
So her wings are made of dust, and her eyes are made of glass, i really like this line, it's so descriptive.
nameless lying bleeding, weaving words of golden grass,
while white lilies will grow eagerly amongst remains of sanity,
and pale reflections of her loss await in groves of vanity.

i love the sonics in the poem, though in places the meter feels a bit awkward. mostly it just flows like honey, sad honey i do admit.
the beginning is strong though it feels like i've heard similar to the 2nd line (though i don't know where) maybe it's just that well done it feels familiar.

some nice s, w, and l sounds going on and the end rhymes are nailed.

i enjoyed it, i do think a small edit could make it even more likable

thanks for the read.