Workshop question

[Erthona]

Todd,

Nice story though.

So why not start with

"She was old and feeble,
but that's not why they pushed her down the stairs.


And see where you end up? Maybe with a similar form/rhythmic pattern, with an end rhyme with stairs. I wouldn't try strict meter as this is too irregular, maybe break it:

"She | was old | and feeble,
but that's | not why | they pushed |
her down | the stairs.

It's kind of like those variable nursery rhyme patterns. Which doesn't mean it is an easy pattern to repeat as you show in your next stanza, which is two syllables too long.

But...

I am fairly certain,
that I could do the same that you've done here!


so it's doable.

Just an idea

Dale