4 or 5 ing-words is fine in a poem of this length (i still don't know a gerund from my arse )
i love some of the imagery you shown. and the narrative is lively. the last verse was my favourite. i have been that paper boy hehe. for me there were spots where you had words that did nothing. words like 'his' before hair, 'feeling of' after creating a. L5.
the opening also feels a bit weak, though i do see it's a build up to the storm. i think it could be more interesting.
i don't think it needs anything major to make it shine. jmo
thanks for the read.