10-20-2011, 04:33 PM
A beautiful piece indeed, bogpan. Subtle, and it made me ache a little. My nit with it is just about translation-- I believe "drops" needs to be qualified ( "rain drops", "dew drops", that sort of thing...just the way it goes). Also, this could use punctuation for the grammar, but if you don't want to just use stanza breaks which work well too.
Thanks very much for the read
Thanks very much for the read
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?