09-27-2011, 07:01 PM
As "brother death" is only introduced in the last line and doesn't have much bearing on what precedes him I don't think his name should be the title of this piece. The poet seems more important than him. Why not call it something like "The Enraptured Scribe"? Just my opinion of course.
The rhyme scheme, which is at once almost spiritually pleasing - the first couplet sent a shiver down my spine - and sometimes jarring through the enjambment you use, reminds me of the great English poet Stevie Smith, who also pondered similar themes. Thanks for the read, John Holland
The rhyme scheme, which is at once almost spiritually pleasing - the first couplet sent a shiver down my spine - and sometimes jarring through the enjambment you use, reminds me of the great English poet Stevie Smith, who also pondered similar themes. Thanks for the read, John Holland
"We believe that we invent symbols. The truth is that they invent us; we are their creatures, shaped by their hard, defining edges." - Gene Wolfe

