Salome

[bogpan]

I thank all who have voiced their opinion. It seems necessary to make clarification on the poem and syntax. Unfortunately, I forget that post in another language and cultural environment in which some of the references are completely unknown. The poem is built on the biblical story of the murder of John the Baptist. For those interested here you can read the whole story, which will meet certain remarks by commentators. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salome One of the most famous poems on this topic has a title and Salome was written by C. Cavafy. In respect of awkward syntax, I can say that the likely reason is that the poem is a translation from Bulgarian and I have a poetic license "odd grammar could be a style, of course, but there needs to be some consistency that makes it decipherable ". I hope I have not violated the rules of the site and the mall it to be excused because they are fluent in English. For me it is very interesting to see concrete proposals for improving the English translation.
Thanks for sharing.