a long way home

[Aish]

Hannah dances
in the back of my
thirsty mind I really like this strophe. It conveys longing in an origianl manner.

head bare in the sun
as she moves

swivel-hipped
to a tune I can’t
quite remember.

Humming to herself and

watching the dust dance
around her pretty feet.

The dark eyes flash lies
and her tanned thighs Nice internal rhyme.
are strong and sinuous.

She laughs to herself
as she dances in the
lonely desert of I've seen 'dances' quite close together - perhaps tell us what kind of dance, or use a synonym.

this man’s dry heart 'dry' ties in nicely 'thirsty' in the opening strophe.

and in the corners
of eyes better suited

to staring through
heat haze at distant
horizon lines

where ghost cattle
walk knee deep
in phantom water

and where the
promise of
tomorrow is

lost inside the
truth of today.

Reality is

a man
a horse
a dog

a long way home.

Welcome, John. Some of your sentences are quite drawn out, but it was a nice read overall. You maintained the allusion of melancholy and the passage of time well. It gives me a profound sense of loss.