Memories

[billy]

As you can see, this is a very personal poem....so please "tread softly because you tread on my dreams"

Memories

The house is silent now
Not sadly silent, softly so.
But, if I sit and listen
I can hear
Bass boom from the attic room
Ben, again - House music's insistent beat
then
Michael Jackson's falsetto
"This is thriller, thriller night..."
The soft slide of John's moonwalking feet.
In Kirstie's room, a baby cries
"Go to sleep my baby
Close your pretty eyes"
Then the slamming of doors
as Laura storms
Upstairs to her room (again)
And there, just faintly
the quiet pad of a small cat's paws.

As each echo grows
Then softly fades and goes
I smile to myself
Though the house is silent now.

Hi jill
it has a feel of home to it (though an empty one now) it doesn't sound as sad as it reads because it feels like the memories are good one. (plus it says so in the 2nd line) it reads well and though you say it's personal it has a universal feel. i really like the read. can it be improved, of course it can, but then it would stop being personal

try to make every word count, use image instead of telling us, show us with words.

thanks for memories