08-08-2011, 02:12 PM
This is a great read, Jack. If I had to offer a suggestion, maybe reevaluate the first two lines: "To look is to heal //so the wise man says". It's not a common expression and pretty ambiguous... i was only completely illuminated when I read your third line. So for me I'd rather you start your poem t the third line, with "I will study my soul...", then if you want put "To look is to heal //so the wise man says" at the start of the second stanza instead. Just imo though, it's totally up to you.
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?