06-26-2011, 06:56 AM
I really like the format of the first six lines (not that I dislike the others, by the way!) -- those "the...one" lines add a lot of detail in a very short space. "I like to observe the wingless" actually gave me a bit of a chill, it's very sinister, and the closing lines are filled with despair. Great poem again, Ris.
It could be worse