On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh

On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh

critical mass Offline

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06-25-2011, 10:13 PM

Leanne

I keep coming back to this.

Somehow you lose the Metaphor in the last line.
I don't like to be interupted like that.

You have 4 excellent stanza's, then you

go from we walked to I walked
then..... you carried

You are making my three typing fingers sore.

David

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Messages In This Thread

On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by Leanne - 06-25-2011, 03:46 PM

RE: On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by Ris Yerg - 06-25-2011, 04:50 PM

RE: On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by Leanne - 06-25-2011, 04:58 PM

RE: On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by critical mass - 06-25-2011, 06:34 PM

RE: On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by billy - 06-25-2011, 08:14 PM

RE: On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by critical mass - 06-25-2011, 10:13 PM

RE: On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by Leanne - 06-26-2011, 06:42 AM

RE: On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by billy - 06-26-2011, 06:54 AM

RE: On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by Leanne - 06-26-2011, 06:58 AM

RE: On Spitting on the Heart -- Reflections of Edinburgh - by billy - 06-26-2011, 07:01 AM

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