Stillness

[billy]

"It is not to be thought that the life of darkness is sunk in misery and lost as if in sorrowing. There is no sorrowing. For sorrow is a thing that is swallowed up in death, and death and dying are the very life of the darkness." - Jacob Boehme

There is no woodland, just stillness,
no weeping shrubs with sunken eyes,
or outstretched limbs from haunted trees,
which subtly betray human minds. really good verse, solid in imagery

Only stillness. Stillness like a gutted car, love these 2 lines
rusting in the grey moonlight,
stillness like a gnome in an empty garden, this one feels out of place
paint peeling like flesh might.

The landscapes that Dante proposed,
the levels and lakes and lilies of hell, one 'and' too many for me
are a farce for those still drawing breath,
slander most merry and comfortable. is it slander or libel?

Death as I see it is an endless road,
bordered by flatlands devoid of features,
beginning and leading and ending nowhere, one 'and' too many for me
indifferent the faces of its travellers. for me the poem ends here

Do I sound indulgently morbid?
If so that was never my intention.
I simply yearn for peace of mind,
endless roads are my obsession.

i thought this was a good solid write jack apart form a couple of nits. the ending thing could just be me but i felt the last verse said very little.
i'm not keen on foot notes and headers. the poem reminds me of of another though i can't think of it. about the and lines, they do read okay but for some reason they make me falter a little thanks for the read jack.