Riding the Paternoster Lift*

[billy]

sorry jack, for me the original 1st was more of a ramble
the;

one which warned,
with more sinister patience than
a schoolmaster’s belt, never to
ride beyond the top floor, or
below the bottom one too, lest
some hideous happening occur.

for me it makes it feel a little enid blighton which doesn't mean it doesn't work and why am i defending myself hehe.

yeah jack for me it felt a little tongue in cheek. compared to the rest of the poem.

i actually liked the tie in of ball and base, as base where he's stationed and base on a field. though the wire works okay as well.