Neither Heaven or Hell.

[billy]

Woah, suddenly Hes enters combat mode.

comment on the poem not the poet or the critic even in fun/admin

I personally like the last stanza, although he DID catch something I missed....
"I think you sacrificed cohesion in order to create a rhyme here, a cardinal sin in my book. Also, like with the last line of the first verse, this seems too elongated."

I concur.

good point both of you .