10-30-2010, 05:10 AM
Hi fico,
When I read most poems I look for the line(s) or the central idea that makes them interesting and stand out. For me that part of your poem is these two lines:
I tried to break the mirror but only made a crack,
It won't set him free, but now I can get in.
When I read this within the context of the poem. I thought how much we become the people we focus on (when we hold on to pain, wrongs, bitterness we subconsciously start to shape ourselves into that person. It's a way that we actually allow people to control us). So in your poem when the speaker breaks the mirror and sees a way to get beyond the surface that is 100% interesting.
It's a cool idea for a poem. You could actually take it much further than you did if you were so inclined.
Best,
Todd
When I read most poems I look for the line(s) or the central idea that makes them interesting and stand out. For me that part of your poem is these two lines:
I tried to break the mirror but only made a crack,
It won't set him free, but now I can get in.
When I read this within the context of the poem. I thought how much we become the people we focus on (when we hold on to pain, wrongs, bitterness we subconsciously start to shape ourselves into that person. It's a way that we actually allow people to control us). So in your poem when the speaker breaks the mirror and sees a way to get beyond the surface that is 100% interesting.
It's a cool idea for a poem. You could actually take it much further than you did if you were so inclined.
Best,
Todd
The secret of poetry is cruelty.--Jon Anderson