06-27-2010, 08:06 AM
Fantastic poem as always. Love the first stanza! And, well, pretty much everything else 
If I were forced to look for something to critique, maybe the last lines can be different. They don't have to be (because they're good) but for me because of the implied richness and "maturity" of cheese-flavored romance, the closing statement could also be "would you care to share?" or something along those lines.
Creative and fun. Awesome
If I were forced to look for something to critique, maybe the last lines can be different. They don't have to be (because they're good) but for me because of the implied richness and "maturity" of cheese-flavored romance, the closing statement could also be "would you care to share?" or something along those lines.
Creative and fun. Awesome
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?