A ballad

[busker]

There's clearly some confusion here (maybe I've been too vague). The narrator is not Ophelia. The first speaker is the current girlfriend. A drowned body like that of Ophelia is what he sees in the water but won't admit it (he lies that he can only see a normal reflection in the water) so the bird has to give the game away. So Ophelia just a symbol for the girl he led to death. Anyway this is what I intended. I must have done a very bad job if I have to explain to this level of detail.

Even when you explain it, the Ophelia analogy doesn’t work.
Hamlet didn’t have a second girlfriend. He died too soon for that.
Ophelia died of grief because she lost hamlet and her father. 
It’s ok to use Ophelia as a throwaway reference in the context, but the scene you set is very detailed and specific. 

But yes, with the explanation, the poem does make sense. Maybe italicise the response and have stanza breaks to make it easier to follow that there are two different persons speaking. I don’t think the penny would drop still, because Hamket is supposed to be dead, but it’d be clearer than the current version