Miracle

[matsunosuperfan]

Just a couple things, theres plenty of compelling imagery and mystery.

The form seems mostly aesthetic, like you wrote a stream of consious paragraph where lines are cut off by length more than content, and separated for looks rather than dramatic pause or separation of ideas.  Not a problem, its just a sense I get reading.  My main concern is the number of 'its' that begin sentences, reminds me of Kerouacs On The Road. How hes searching for IT, which could be effective, I just think you use it too many times

Ah thanks for reading - great point about the "it"s, I didn't notice that and now it's bothering me too.