falling for your bluff.

[ilovewomenandbeer]

falling for your bluff.

my descent arose
in the dive i made falling for you.
the further i fell,
the less of myself i held onto.

ribs strained to make room
for rancour i’d accrue.
naïvely praying someday,
my rest would soon ensue.

but through it all, you threw
all debris on me to bear.
every added ounce
left me further frayed with wear.

rifts and tears flayed the place
my heart used to be.
severed from the sleeve
that anchored me to the belief

that one day, the pain would pay off,
and the games you’d play
would wither away,
and i could finally stay off

the edge of this bluff
i’d hung so high from.
this hill i’d willingly die on.

mounted close to commune
with clouds we’d lain under,
i was now left to wonder
whether they’d extend the grace
of saving me at all.

at last, began to grasp
the cranes in our sky
only heightened my fall.

and you’d have the gall
to just watch me unravel.

i held on for our life, my dear.
yet still wallow in the gravel
of your grave mistakes.

[i have never written a poem before but i've been going through it lately lol and i ended up writing this, feedback would be greatly appreciated ]

---

falling for your bluff.

my descent arose
in the dive i made falling for you.
the further i fell,
the less of myself i held onto.

ribs strained to make room
for rancour i never outgrew.
naïvely praying someday,
my rest would ring due.

but through it all, you threw all
burdens on me to bear.
every added ounce
left me more worn with wear.

rifts and tears were left
where my heart used to be.
severed from the sleeve
that anchored me

to the belief
that one day, the pain would pay off,
and the games you'd play
would wither away,
and i could finally stay off

the edge of this bluff
i'd hung so high from.
this hill i'd willingly die on.

now mounted close to commune
with clouds we had laid under,
i was left to wonder
whether they'd extend the grace
of saving me at all.

at last, began to grasp
the cranes in our sky
would only deepen my fall.

and you'd have the gall to just watch it unravel.

i held on for our life, my dear.
yet still wallow in the gravel 
of your grave mistakes. 

I’m kinda new to poetry, but one thing I like to do is, when I imagine a scene, I try to describe it in my head with two words. It usually works when I’m trying to condense my imagery without explaining and just letting the imagery imply it.
For example:
rifts and tears were left
where my heart used to be.
severed from the sleeve
that anchored me

could be
rifts and tears left—
gaping heartache—
severed from anchoring sleeves.

I love the emotional weight—
but that’s one thing I’ve learned
while editing my poems:
I can make them stronger.

Hopefully this wasn't too overboard for basic.