"Sybaris is my City"
Sybaris is my city, not my shame.
I scorn Prudence, Salome sings my tune.
Vice writes my verses, virtues I'll not name.
Nunc est bibendum, I strum my Lydian lyre,
My Duty bends to Cyprian desire,
My Temperance writhes in Bacchante fires.
I live the lies they breathe of Magdalene still,
Brew spiced Soma for nocturnal thrills,
And sing wild hymns unfit for Lilith's quill.
Though every song must fade, and passions freeze,
I drown my nights in wine and whispered pleas,
As I moan lines of Sappho on bruised knees.
Spare me the stoic's dismal hope;
Icarus gilds my fall, not Cato’s rope.
My gospel spills from a decadent throat.
I am mostly wondering about whether the references in this seem properly used or pretentious. I know the poem as a whole is dripping with pretension, but I at least want the references to land.
Also it occurs to me that I posted my other poems in the wrong forum, because I misunderstood the purpose of the "intensive" channel, which I realise now is for much more accomplished poets than me, looking for very precise and technical criticism, so if a mod could move my posts to this channel, I would very much appreciate it ::pray::
Sybaris is my city, not my shame.
I scorn Prudence, Salome sings my tune.
Vice writes my verses, virtues I'll not name.
Nunc est bibendum, I strum my Lydian lyre,
My Duty bends to Cyprian desire,
My Temperance writhes in Bacchante fires.
I live the lies they breathe of Magdalene still,
Brew spiced Soma for nocturnal thrills,
And sing wild hymns unfit for Lilith's quill.
Though every song must fade, and passions freeze,
I drown my nights in wine and whispered pleas,
As I moan lines of Sappho on bruised knees.
Spare me the stoic's dismal hope;
Icarus gilds my fall, not Cato’s rope.
My gospel spills from a decadent throat.
I am mostly wondering about whether the references in this seem properly used or pretentious. I know the poem as a whole is dripping with pretension, but I at least want the references to land.
Also it occurs to me that I posted my other poems in the wrong forum, because I misunderstood the purpose of the "intensive" channel, which I realise now is for much more accomplished poets than me, looking for very precise and technical criticism, so if a mod could move my posts to this channel, I would very much appreciate it ::pray::