The sleepless fly (?)

[rowens]

escaping sleep,
like a fly escapes the grasp of a giant


Helps to look at pace:

escaping sleep,
like a fly from a giant


seemingly free,
Good. 

The next line could be reworked.
to no avail in the abundance of quiet dreams

that make one feel awake and lively,
yet broken and frightened

of what's to come.


And so on with pacing and reworking rhythms and meanings. 


the next day: hit by humbling sobriety

of the mind
that at night seemed to conquer so violently

all the lands too far, forgotten 
by the flying society

while the giant's held out hand just tried to ward off anxiety.