flock together, v2

[RiverNotch]

thanks for the feedback. some notes, as i can't directly follow the suggestions before stanza five without gutting the piece entirely:

the whole thing is a riff on the Billie Eilish song "Birds of the Feather": the imagery of stanzas five and six are taken directly from the song
"hooks" is a synecdoche for shrikes: they use their hooked beaks to literally do what stanza two describes
"my corkscrew / and your cork" isn't a shift to people, as drakes have corkscrew penises