08-17-2023, 05:49 AM
Well, what's to be said about this one except that it reads like an absolute dream. If someone had interrupted me while I was reading this, I would have asked them what the eff they wanted. Until.....the last stanza, when the gentle road through the forest of ideas turned to a gravel road pockmarked with potholes, and I flew over the handlebars of my bike and am now covered in bruises. I'll be suing you for damages -- expect a call.
Are you quoting from the Quran? That would explain the shift in tone. I don't know if it's culturally insensitive to paraphrase such an important work, but please find a workaround or just another topic for the ending.
The piece doesn't read as disjointed (until the end) because the music is the through line.
I have no quibble with the content, but I like comparative religion so much that it was one of my majors in university. I say that to acknowledge that I may be more of the target audience for this piece than most. I wouldn't expect everyone to react the same way.
It's nice to see the universe rewarding hard work. In the tone of the British, it's not bad.
Are you quoting from the Quran? That would explain the shift in tone. I don't know if it's culturally insensitive to paraphrase such an important work, but please find a workaround or just another topic for the ending.
The piece doesn't read as disjointed (until the end) because the music is the through line.
I have no quibble with the content, but I like comparative religion so much that it was one of my majors in university. I say that to acknowledge that I may be more of the target audience for this piece than most. I wouldn't expect everyone to react the same way.
It's nice to see the universe rewarding hard work. In the tone of the British, it's not bad.