07-26-2023, 09:27 PM
(07-26-2023, 09:44 AM)CRNDLSM Wrote: Acorns collectingMaybe ‘gather’ instead of ‘collecting’?
Reflecting tree branch dances
together apart
‘Reflecting tree branch dances” doesn’t sound right. You mean shadows, but shadows aren’t reflections by definition. Would it work by inverting the order and having the tree branches shadow dance on a screen of acorns or something like that?
‘Together apart’ can be the title. I don’t think abstraction works well in short poems like this one

