06-19-2023, 05:54 AM
refracted as the deepest sea. - this line is confusing to me. Firstly, what is being "refracted" from the previous lines? And secondly, "refracted as the sea"? The sea isn't refracted. So, something can't be refracted as it. I wonder what you thought this line meant. And I also wonder what other readers think you meant by this line.
I cant resist being invited to give an opinion. I'm going to strongly differ here and say that I don't find it confusing at all. Water refracts light, water in the ocean is refracted. Light is also refracted by the leaves of trees. Ergo, we are extending the metaphor for how a forest is like an ocean.
I get you brynmawr1. When you want to get gotten, come get me.
As for everything else, I am going to agree. It's a nice poem. Nothing jumps out at me that I'd change really. But I'm sleepy, so if my opinion truck fills up, I'll back it in and let it dump.
Thanks for the share!
Valerie, Please
I cant resist being invited to give an opinion. I'm going to strongly differ here and say that I don't find it confusing at all. Water refracts light, water in the ocean is refracted. Light is also refracted by the leaves of trees. Ergo, we are extending the metaphor for how a forest is like an ocean.
I get you brynmawr1. When you want to get gotten, come get me.
As for everything else, I am going to agree. It's a nice poem. Nothing jumps out at me that I'd change really. But I'm sleepy, so if my opinion truck fills up, I'll back it in and let it dump.
Thanks for the share!
Valerie, Please