One-way Ticket (new title) final...

[Tiger the Lion]

Hey Bryn. Been following this for awhile. I agree with TB that this one feels finished. I only wonder about one bit below...

The low whistle
of the early train 
leaving me awake
 
on the hard side
of dreaming for
the sound of return.
 
Down in the valley
a dog barks
to be let back in.
 
Covers tugged
to my chin, I listen
to birds barter for love.
 
My feet searching     I want this to be "search" rather than "searching." Both for tense consistency and sentence 
the chill, settling       [b]fragment.[/b]
each for the other.

It’s cold here
but it shouldn't be
in mid-May.
 
The low whistle
of the early train leaving
wakes me in the dim light.

In the distance
a dog cries begging
to be let back in.
 
Covers tugged tight
to my chin, I listen
to birds barter for love.
 
My feet searching
the chill only to settle
each for the other.

Twenty-five years
it would have been
mid-May.

It’s cold here
and it shouldn’t be
in mid-May.
 
The first bird chitters
my defeated sleep
in the dim light.
The grey before dawn
 
builds the chorus one by one
calling for the rising sun
to bring a day I don’t want begun.
 
Covers tugged tight
to my chin, I listen
to birds barter for love.
 
My feet search within
the empty chill having to settle
each for the other.

It’s cold here
and it shouldn’t be
in mid-May.
 
The first bird chitters
a defeated sleep
in the dim light.
The grey before dawn
 
builds the chorus one by one
calling for the rising sun
to bring a day I don’t want begun.
 
Covers tugged tight
to my chin, I listen
to birds barter for love.
 
My feet search within
the chill only to settle
each for the other.
 
It’s cold here.
It didn’t used to be
in mid-May.