03-30-2023, 11:52 PM
Hi Tim-
Steve is right, ‘reflected back’ is redundant: just ‘reflected’ is a minor change.
That last stanza and end line seem to be causing the most trouble.
How bout:
‘It’s a universe we share- he is father to my grief,
and I am father to his memory- fused now
by the happenstance of these reflections.
Steve is right, ‘reflected back’ is redundant: just ‘reflected’ is a minor change.
That last stanza and end line seem to be causing the most trouble.
How bout:
‘It’s a universe we share- he is father to my grief,
and I am father to his memory- fused now
by the happenstance of these reflections.