05-22-2010, 08:03 AM
It does seem wordy, but I like it. It's part and parcel of your style. I loved that it allows you room in the story for focusing not so much on the broadstroke but on the minute details... I especially liked the description of seasons in Saskatchewan, and the variety of cups. If it needs a touch-up, a mild one will do imo
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?