Grand children would be easier
#3
(11-07-2022, 01:17 PM)brynmawr1 Wrote:  We struggled to find a name
hoping to plug a hole or put
an egg back in the nest.
 
Only eleven weeks, 8.9lbs
we decide on Penny, tho’
my wife has started calling her
Pepper.
 
She loves that fuzzy bear we bought
at Target, soft as my heart,
which she ravages like she owns it.
 
On walks people ask what she is
with her tufted, terrier scruff
of a chin and her half-mast ears.
 
I say she is everything.
First stanza is marvellous.  Intentional or not, I thought this was about a human infant until I got to the "tufted, terrier scruff/of a chin..."  Then I wondered if you'd birthed a freak.  "Suely not" I said to myself, "a bearded child?" and after a second or third reading, I realized I'd been tricked.  Or tricked myself with expectation.

Sorry, not much of a critique.  I guess I wouldn't change a thing.
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Messages In This Thread
Grand children would be easier - by brynmawr1 - 11-07-2022, 01:17 PM
RE: Grand children would be easier - by rowens - 11-07-2022, 02:26 PM
RE: Grand children would be easier - by brynmawr1 - 11-08-2022, 11:55 AM
RE: Grand children would be easier - by TranquillityBase - 11-07-2022, 10:33 PM
RE: Grand children would be easier - by brynmawr1 - 11-18-2022, 12:56 PM



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