03-24-2022, 09:25 PM
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Hi Mark
i've changed the order because the place you'll find the .'blue note' is in the 'melancholia of glass on steel', nice phrase cheers
Like I said, happily ignorant
As regards 'fiery hands', Reverend Gary Davis has a tune where he sings "i got fiery fingers and i got fiery hands and when i get on up to heaven i'm gonna join the fiery band" and he's blues so i thought it would be a common idea but i checked it out and it's not.
I wonder if he meant 'fiery' in the sense of passionate, rather than, as it read in your original, fast?
The revision is, I think, an improvement, but you do seem to have lost some of that original energy, it feels a bit static. Cutting 'slaps' (with its percussive connotations, energy and violence) weakens the piece, for me. Struggling also to imagine what 'electric African rhythm' is. I think what you have was a good starting point, but it needs developing. Also, what happens when the note is found?
Best, Knot
.
Hi Mark
i've changed the order because the place you'll find the .'blue note' is in the 'melancholia of glass on steel', nice phrase cheers
Like I said, happily ignorant
As regards 'fiery hands', Reverend Gary Davis has a tune where he sings "i got fiery fingers and i got fiery hands and when i get on up to heaven i'm gonna join the fiery band" and he's blues so i thought it would be a common idea but i checked it out and it's not.
I wonder if he meant 'fiery' in the sense of passionate, rather than, as it read in your original, fast?
The revision is, I think, an improvement, but you do seem to have lost some of that original energy, it feels a bit static. Cutting 'slaps' (with its percussive connotations, energy and violence) weakens the piece, for me. Struggling also to imagine what 'electric African rhythm' is. I think what you have was a good starting point, but it needs developing. Also, what happens when the note is found?
Best, Knot
.