Senescence

[Knot]

.

Hi TqB,

I may have tinkered too much,

I think I'd agree, especially in cutting the 'friends' line. The title (which I had to look up) kept taking me to certain plants, so while I think it's an improvement, I'm not sure it works ... yet.

Not keen on the opening line, there a whiff of self pity there, I think.

And the 'or simply another' line comes out of nowhere. To what is it related to, narratively or grammatically?

Senecio

The world has shrunk

to the size it was when I was a child.

I spend my days meditating

on a shorn winter field:

this is no way to go,

this is the best way to go

I’m not sure which, but sure

I’ll never know the answer.

............ to me, this seems a complete poem, but assuming you disagree (and why wouldn't you?) I think you're missing something from second/final half. A thought equivalent to, or a recapitulation of, 'the world has shrunk' perhaps? Or some memory of being taught to 'look both ways' when N was an actual child?

All my friends passed on

into a level distance that has no map

I cross and recross

an abandoned road ................ having a hard time reconciling this with 'meditating'

looking both ways

an obedient child of time.

Best, Knot

.