10-17-2021, 06:23 AM
(10-17-2021, 02:23 AM)Mark A Becker Wrote: In What We TrustI enjoyed reading this, Mark.
Good ole Buck was a big bear
of a dog, an all-black shepherd
with a small white tie on his chest.
One early autumn evening we sat
perched on the top steps of the porch
at my brother’s place, eavesdropping strong opening.
on the urgent chirping of the last crickets.
A cool breeze stirred up the earthiness "earthiness" is weak to my read, could be improved. Maybe even by just changing it to "earth"
of freshly fallen leaves. Old oaks stretched
moonlit limbs into a clearing at the edge limbs stretched into a clearing - can't really picture this myself.
of shadow filled woods. Buck focused his gaze
on something that I couldn’t quite see.
His gentle orange eyes reflected
the rising moon with an awareness i like this - it may be stronger if you move "orange" to follow "moon".
for which he had no description. Me?
I imagined bare dogwood branches as arms
cradling that crescent moon; saw mighty Jupiter
wooing the lonely Autumn Star. this is nice - i think you could cut "saw" though.
As I pondered the infinite, Buck rested
his furry head upon my shoulder
as if to console me. How did he seem
to understand what I was thinking?
Though I’d been taught that we were given
dominion over animals, I had to reconsider.
I asked out loud, “if I’m really created
in Your image, then what about Buck?
In whose image was he created?"
How is it that this simple animal
seems so finely attuned to something
that I have only half-hearted faith in? I like the ideas, but there may be too many similar rhetorical questions in one burst.
You may think I’m foolish; or confused,
yet I’m certain of that autumn evening
on the porch; thought of it often
since we buried ole Buck by the brambles
near the clearing in my brother’s back yard
nearly 40 years ago. strong ending - the narrator trusts the feelings and moments they've experienced strongest.