09-19-2021, 02:44 PM
(09-19-2021, 11:59 AM)rowens Wrote: Is this true?I appreciate your feedback. I will rearrange some of the wording.
The stasis is concrete. I don't think or feel the men are defaced.
The prison you visit every night sounds like a past.
I'd work on the adjectives.
But you're not me. Not I.
You can splice it up, make it, make it more surreal-like like your other poems, and put some heat-reality into it make it seem tangible with all the stuff.

