Stagnant

[Kerbonzo_beenz]

Is this true?

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The stasis is concrete. I don't think or feel the men are defaced.

The prison you visit every night sounds like a past.

I'd work on the adjectives.

But you're not me. Not I.

You can splice it up, make it, make it more surreal-like like your other poems, and put some heat-reality into it make it seem tangible with all the stuff.

I appreciate your feedback. I will rearrange some of the wording.