Greyabbey Trail

[busker]

Before autumn punished the woods ...before AUTUMN punished the WOODS.... I don't think 'punished' works in this line. It's a syllable too long.
with dew and leaves and coughing ... love this one
children running late to school ... one of the things I don't like about this first strophe is the regularity of the rhymes. As it stands, it would read better without the 'running'
wearing backpacks black as ravens
cawing tantrums in the wind,  ... I understand the raven simile-metaphor being extended here, but you've already mentioned coughing once. I don't see the need for repetition.

I napped below a robin singing August,  ... don't like 'napped' (too prosaic) and 'singing August' (it's a cliched expression to 'sing' anything)
golden in the luster of trees swaying gently ... lovely
full of apples, waking with fresh clouds ... the best line in the poem. beautiful. original
to watch the sun and moon share the sky ... and this one
at dusk.

I am not the master of scansion, but the lines, while beautiful, were jerky to my ears.
the second strophe is the heart of the poem
is the first one needed?
could be a great short poem with the second strophe alone