Whenever jim saw red,
he usually bowed his head.
He'd lay in bed and pray the dead
would return instead to be fed
Jim was timid and wary,
He hated this other guy Larry.
Larry would parry 'well, you'll never marry,
you'll never even see the cherry.'
One day Larry called out to Jim,
'my sisters in town on a whim,
Don't be so dim, go out on a limb'
And invited him out with the them.
So jim, Larry, and Mabel,
easily found a good table.
Ordered top label, and quickly were able
to make more than their chairs unstable.
Larry wandered off to mingle
And Mabel gave jim a good tingle
They were both single, the songs a good jingle
'Let's go take a peak at that dingle.'
The next morning back at the office
He quickly became very nauseous.
An email he lost his job, but the cause is
a dick pic went out to all his bosses.
Jim asked Larry about his sister.
But Larry just laughed, 'listen mister,
You must have pissed her off when you kissed her,
Mabel's a bitch, And you dissed her.'
So jim was a little confused
Never had he been so abused
A noose is too loose, it's time to light a fuse
And just turn everyone into juice.
He filled the car up with gas
Inside and out for the blast
To work hauling ass, right through the glass
And he passed but the fire didn't last.
I thought this would be about zombies
Then maybe I'd write about trannies
What about bombings or ironic endings
Fuck it I'm just not good at limericks
he usually bowed his head.
He'd lay in bed and pray the dead
would return instead to be fed
Jim was timid and wary,
He hated this other guy Larry.
Larry would parry 'well, you'll never marry,
you'll never even see the cherry.'
One day Larry called out to Jim,
'my sisters in town on a whim,
Don't be so dim, go out on a limb'
And invited him out with the them.
So jim, Larry, and Mabel,
easily found a good table.
Ordered top label, and quickly were able
to make more than their chairs unstable.
Larry wandered off to mingle
And Mabel gave jim a good tingle
They were both single, the songs a good jingle
'Let's go take a peak at that dingle.'
The next morning back at the office
He quickly became very nauseous.
An email he lost his job, but the cause is
a dick pic went out to all his bosses.
Jim asked Larry about his sister.
But Larry just laughed, 'listen mister,
You must have pissed her off when you kissed her,
Mabel's a bitch, And you dissed her.'
So jim was a little confused
Never had he been so abused
A noose is too loose, it's time to light a fuse
And just turn everyone into juice.
He filled the car up with gas
Inside and out for the blast
To work hauling ass, right through the glass
And he passed but the fire didn't last.
I thought this would be about zombies
Then maybe I'd write about trannies
What about bombings or ironic endings
Fuck it I'm just not good at limericks
Peanut butter honey banana sandwiches