Rayuela

[Knot]

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Hi TqB,
it takes a while for this piece to find its feet, but 'the touch of your fingers ... over' makes it worth the effort,
and the ending (except for the very last line which I think you should cut. Not only because the preceding line
is better, but you're saying that it's your shrine that makes the spirit better, which isn't what you mean, I suspect).

You used the phrase 'your passage' before. It doesn't bear repeating.


Rayuela ............... I don't think this makes a good title, 'I'm thinking of a cedar box' however


I’m thinking of a cedar box,
sealed with copper nails, ....................bit more detail, perhaps?
to add to my reliquary of pens .......... don't explain this, it's much more interesting this way, I think).

I was going through your books, again
when I came to Rayuela; poor thing
it looked as if you'd left it out in the rain.

I went to toss it into the garbage
but started thumbing through, instead
and found pressed flowers inside.
Two or three every fifty pages or so.

The touch of your fingers,
preserved a hundred times over ...................there's something in this piece that suggest the exact number is known.

They are all the same flower, small(?)
white, almost transparent
unlabelled, but I recognize them
from your photographs
and the pictures
composed of dried flowers
that you made in Spain:
a seahorse, a goldfish, two lovers.

I'm thinking I will build a shrine
of limestone and cedar
in the oak grove we cleared together.
Finally I will have a place to pray


Best, Knot


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