Show me the bricks
#4
Hello Frenchie,

I think your poem highlights your frustration well. I did feel the line "show me options A, B and C" was a little off, and I think at some points the poem veered into a bullet-point, "tell" territory as opposed to showing us your emotions. But I think it aligns with showing frustration in general. The "don't tell me" refrain got a tad repetitive for me, maybe use it once and let the remaining phrases follow? 

An easy, light read.
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Messages In This Thread
Show me the bricks - by Frenchie - 03-14-2021, 01:46 AM
RE: Show me the bricks - by Knot - 03-14-2021, 03:33 AM
RE: Show me the bricks - by Mark A Becker - 03-15-2021, 09:44 PM
RE: Show me the bricks - by vinitakshv - 03-26-2021, 11:49 PM
RE: Show me the bricks - by savannah - 04-10-2021, 04:21 AM
RE: Show me the bricks - by newbie - 06-04-2021, 06:09 AM
RE: Show me the bricks - by ZonaIncerta - 06-07-2021, 09:58 AM
RE: Show me the bricks - by micah3801 - 06-08-2021, 04:15 AM
RE: Show me the bricks - by SPOKENDAWORD - 09-03-2021, 12:13 AM



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