02-22-2021, 08:36 AM
"sour-scrunched" I just don't like, can't explain why, maybe because it adds nothing understandable to me in what it's modifying
"second hand smoke" and "sloppy seconds" really feel out of place compared to the rest of the imagery.
I'm assuming you set yourself some kind of challenge related to the alliteration which I think is a fun read.
Really, really like that last stanza (except for, as mentioned, "sloppy seconds")
"second hand smoke" and "sloppy seconds" really feel out of place compared to the rest of the imagery.
I'm assuming you set yourself some kind of challenge related to the alliteration which I think is a fun read.
Really, really like that last stanza (except for, as mentioned, "sloppy seconds")