09-12-2020, 04:39 AM
The Symbolos are entities
That tell the truth in riddles
Whether in great complexities
Or tunes upon a fiddle .................. so Symbolos' play the fiddle? Odd choice.
One sat upon a too-small throne
His visage like a fractal
He speaks his mind with poetry
In meter ever-dactyl: ............... waaaaaaay too far of a reach for this rhyme
"Reading this poem in a poem is a soul
Whose vision of me is apart and not whole
And likewise, whose knowledge of words is not such
To see, in this poem in a poem, very much" ....... why the " " marks? Is this a poem within a poem? So now we're aware that we're in a poem.
His words sent echoes through the room
Which found itself in open air
And though it felt just like a tomb
The walls of which just were not there ..... liked that stanza.
And so all things are tied apart
A riddle like a work of art
And in Symbolic brush we find
The strokes that make a thinking mind .... Symbolic, Symbolos, ???? Why did you capitalize Symbolic?
Needs a little more definition. Not certain what you're trying to say. Some nice parts. The feel was good but I'm not sure where I went.
Jack
That tell the truth in riddles
Whether in great complexities
Or tunes upon a fiddle .................. so Symbolos' play the fiddle? Odd choice.
One sat upon a too-small throne
His visage like a fractal
He speaks his mind with poetry
In meter ever-dactyl: ............... waaaaaaay too far of a reach for this rhyme
"Reading this poem in a poem is a soul
Whose vision of me is apart and not whole
And likewise, whose knowledge of words is not such
To see, in this poem in a poem, very much" ....... why the " " marks? Is this a poem within a poem? So now we're aware that we're in a poem.
His words sent echoes through the room
Which found itself in open air
And though it felt just like a tomb
The walls of which just were not there ..... liked that stanza.
And so all things are tied apart
A riddle like a work of art
And in Symbolic brush we find
The strokes that make a thinking mind .... Symbolic, Symbolos, ???? Why did you capitalize Symbolic?
Needs a little more definition. Not certain what you're trying to say. Some nice parts. The feel was good but I'm not sure where I went.
Jack